Childhood trauma isn’t something you just get over as you grow up. Pediatrician Nadine Burke Harris explains that the repeated stress of abuse, neglect and …
My parents divorced the year I was born,if not the month. My mom was almost never there. She moved a lot. And I met my father at the age of 15. I'm glad I wasn't with him before because even though he is not the worst father, but he is detached and doesn't see anybody but himself, he doesn't know how to raise a kid. My grandma raised me and even though she tried her best and a lot of the times I felt she filled the space of both my parents absence, but growing up, I know nobody can fill up the space of parents. Nobody. And before 16 I left my grandma and the only family I knew and we had almost no contact, and the little we had I initiated mostly. As an adult I'm detached a lot, i don't know how to be myself and there is almost nobody I have an actual connection with.
I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist "clinically depressed from birth". I've survived but my life has been a hot mess… I've often fallen asleep wondering "what if?"
This really is the depth of society's problems. The good news is that your childhood experiences do not have to define you and if your desire is to have children of your own then you can absolutely provide a safe, nurturing and loving space for them to develop a secure attachment with you, plenty of research now supporting this. Thanks to professionals like Dr Burke and Dr Siegal that are making this priority!
we need permits for everything we produce and present to our world…its time to require ' birth permits' after the first child. . raising a child is the most important creation skill we have.
I'm not a parent and I don't plan to be one but this makes me realize that my parents are without a doubt, your typical Asian boomer parents. My parents, especially my mom, always say that she "never lacks" in raising me and gave "everything" I ever wanted. But all my mom gave to me was a house and just financial support for my studies. The moment I decided I do not enjoy the college program they are forcing me to finish is the moment they stopped supporting me, even financially. My parents became so much worse after that. My mom often calls me ugly and always guilt trip me at everything I do, especially when I do the things that make me calm or happy. She even says that my boyfriend will eventually break up with me because of my "attitude" and "behavior". She started calling me a drug addict even though I refused to take drugs. I just play video games, make art using my laptop, and just outline the story I've been trying to work on for years now. My parents say that watching anime and playing video games are like taking drugs and honestly, my parents just want me to be the child that I want. Anyway, I may have ranted too much. I really wish my mother didn't give birth to me if she'll only treat me like this. It's like I am the biggest mistake in her life. This TED talk is very informative and as much as I wanna share this with my parents, they'll just say that mental health doesn't exist and depressed isn't real.
Oufff Dr. Nadine Burke Harris hitting the nail on the head of childhood trauma and its effects on health across a lifetime. I would add as an educator, that is also affects the we children/adults alike, learn.
People deny themselves, turn away from god for their own minds perceptions of truth, and we spin the damage done to us towards others. I wish the system was better for the future.
Not my parents. Was raped at age 5, some stranger. Could that be the cause of the epilepsy, weak bladder, chronic constipation? Definitely. So our medical aid got the epilepsy under control. But no doctor wants to perscribe a water pill for me. And what are the symptoms if chronic constipation and water problems are not adressed? Liver and kidneys could fail because of all the toxins in the body. Is nobody listening? I need medical attention and our medical aid won't cover it!
You are amazing! ❤ I watch a lot of self help videos and read a lot of self help books. I wish the world had more people that think the way you do. A lot of people raise their kids the way they were raised by their parents… and it's just a vicious cycle that's so hard for people to break. I so badly want to have kids, but I'm also so scared that I would raise them/treat them the way I was raised and the way I was treated growing up. I've always told myself that if and when I do have kids, I will take parenting classes! I wish that parenting classes were required for people who are going to have children. It would simply make the world a better place. Right now there are just too many sad stories and not enough happy people. If everyone knew how to parent and raise children, how to be GREAT parents… imagine how much different the world would be….
Barking up the wrong tree to think that inner city black issues are marginalized compared to whites. White issues don't get screen time.
My parents divorced the year I was born,if not the month. My mom was almost never there. She moved a lot. And I met my father at the age of 15. I'm glad I wasn't with him before because even though he is not the worst father, but he is detached and doesn't see anybody but himself, he doesn't know how to raise a kid. My grandma raised me and even though she tried her best and a lot of the times I felt she filled the space of both my parents absence, but growing up, I know nobody can fill up the space of parents. Nobody. And before 16 I left my grandma and the only family I knew and we had almost no contact, and the little we had I initiated mostly. As an adult I'm detached a lot, i don't know how to be myself and there is almost nobody I have an actual connection with.
her: people with a high ace score are more likely to have health issues
me, a person who had been molested regularly for at least 3 years : and i oop
I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist "clinically depressed from birth".
I've survived but my life has been a hot mess…
I've often fallen asleep wondering "what if?"
OMG!!! This woman made me cry with her beautiful soul
She sounds so powerful and intelligent.
This really is the depth of society's problems. The good news is that your childhood experiences do not have to define you and if your desire is to have children of your own then you can absolutely provide a safe, nurturing and loving space for them to develop a secure attachment with you, plenty of research now supporting this. Thanks to professionals like Dr Burke and Dr Siegal that are making this priority!
Such a great presentation.
I have never heard such an articulate speech!! Doctor Nadine Burke Harris hit the nail. Would love more information.
we need permits for everything we produce and present to our world…its time to require ' birth permits' after the first child. . raising a child is the most important creation skill we have.
I'm not a parent and I don't plan to be one but this makes me realize that my parents are without a doubt, your typical Asian boomer parents. My parents, especially my mom, always say that she "never lacks" in raising me and gave "everything" I ever wanted. But all my mom gave to me was a house and just financial support for my studies. The moment I decided I do not enjoy the college program they are forcing me to finish is the moment they stopped supporting me, even financially. My parents became so much worse after that. My mom often calls me ugly and always guilt trip me at everything I do, especially when I do the things that make me calm or happy. She even says that my boyfriend will eventually break up with me because of my "attitude" and "behavior". She started calling me a drug addict even though I refused to take drugs. I just play video games, make art using my laptop, and just outline the story I've been trying to work on for years now. My parents say that watching anime and playing video games are like taking drugs and honestly, my parents just want me to be the child that I want.
Anyway, I may have ranted too much. I really wish my mother didn't give birth to me if she'll only treat me like this. It's like I am the biggest mistake in her life. This TED talk is very informative and as much as I wanna share this with my parents, they'll just say that mental health doesn't exist and depressed isn't real.
Oufff Dr. Nadine Burke Harris hitting the nail on the head of childhood trauma and its effects on health across a lifetime. I would add as an educator, that is also affects the we children/adults alike, learn.
People deny themselves, turn away from god for their own minds perceptions of truth, and we spin the damage done to us towards others. I wish the system was better for the future.
What’s sad is these stressors for the young are being amplified more and more..
Not my parents. Was raped at age 5, some stranger. Could that be the cause of the epilepsy, weak bladder, chronic constipation? Definitely. So our medical aid got the epilepsy under control. But no doctor wants to perscribe a water pill for me. And what are the symptoms if chronic constipation and water problems are not adressed? Liver and kidneys could fail because of all the toxins in the body. Is nobody listening? I need medical attention and our medical aid won't cover it!
I scored a 7 on the ace test. I just don’t want to take my mental health down to my own children, like my mother did with me.
What an amazing lady. She does fantastic work and is very charismatic and engaging. Thank you for doing this talk. Its such an interesting subject ?
I mean it’s not shocking that 67% have at least one ace. Parental separation is one of them.
She put into words the level of pain children in unhealthy mental environments are in, and the long term destruction it can cause.
What a legend. Legit Hero
You are amazing! ❤
I watch a lot of self help videos and read a lot of self help books. I wish the world had more people that think the way you do.
A lot of people raise their kids the way they were raised by their parents… and it's just a vicious cycle that's so hard for people to break.
I so badly want to have kids, but I'm also so scared that I would raise them/treat them the way I was raised and the way I was treated growing up.
I've always told myself that if and when I do have kids, I will take parenting classes! I wish that parenting classes were required for people who are going to have children. It would simply make the world a better place. Right now there are just too many sad stories and not enough happy people. If everyone knew how to parent and raise children, how to be GREAT parents… imagine how much different the world would be….
Amazing talk indeed. Would be great to have access (or the written name for more effective dissemination) to that paper/study she mentions.
I’m praying for most of the black community. We don’t take mental health seriously and most of us are highly affected.
Music heals: https://youtu.be/3wwDo2IBjuM
Explained this so well.
This explains so much.
This woman changed the way I want to do business and show up in the world… such great information and she speaks it so powerfully and with such caring